Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Come on, deliver!

“Could it be? Yes, it could! Something's coming, something good, if I can wait. Something's coming, I don't know what it is, but it is gonna be great!”

I’ve been feeling frustrated lately. I sense that something great is just around the corner (as Tony says in “West Side Story”), but it’s not here yet, and I’m impatient from waiting!

I tried to combat these feelings over the weekend by distracting myself with fantasy, watching episodes of “Kung Fu” and hoping that Caine’s calm demeanor would rub off on me. No such luck. I’d be way too antsy to last for five minutes in a Shaolin temple.

So this morning I tried the practical route – listing all the exhibits, grants, commission inquiries, and other professional opportunities I’ve applied for or been contacted about, along with their specified notification dates, if available. There are ELEVEN separate possibilities that I’m waiting to hear back about!

In doing this, I realized that only a few of them will likely be resolved before May 1. Discovering this doesn’t make me any less impatient, but at least I see that I’m going to have to find patience SOMEWHERE, because the answers aren’t going to come right away.

Meanwhile, since the David Carradine approach didn’t work, I’m trying to do what all the New Age-y books suggest, and remember a time in my life when I anticipated something wonderful and it did indeed happen. In the fall of 2001, I applied for a prestigious grant. So much time went by that I forgot I’d even applied. Then one morning the following June, I received an envelope with no return address on it. I opened it and out fell a check made out to me from the grant foundation – for $2,000!

Hopefully, history will repeat itself.

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