Getting untangled

I am continuing on in this mode of -- what do I call it? Nothing as extreme as deprivation or isolation. It simply seems natural right now that I let go of a lot of the "shoulds" and routines of my life, do less or do nothing, and see what happens. I'm usually such a driven goal-setter/go-getter, that this is a welcome change of pace to correspond to the lighter work load I have during the month of July.

It seems that when you clear out, your brain and body come into balance. When you release the old outdated habits, the new needs and wants present themselves clearly.

I've let all my art supplies run out, and now it seems clear what I need to buy to replenish. I returned all the books, DVDs and CDs to the library, and now I'm getting ideas on what books, movies and music I want to move on to. I've cut out all the foods I usually eat and am consuming just enough healthy basics -- brown rice and lentils, oatmeal with rice milk, fruits and vegetables -- to keep from feeling hungry, and my system is clearing itself and asking for new and different foods. I'm also taking vitamin supplements, sitting out in the sun for safe periods, and gently exercising daily.

Just a bit of puttering in the studio (made the painting above over the last few days), but I'm trying to make only things I feel like making, not anything in particular for any particular reason.

It's taken me until age 47 to realize that it's both reasonable and possible to live life my way, even though that lifestyle seems to have no relationship to how we're "supposed" to live (i.e., hectic pace, hyper social life, extravagant possessions).

Remember Ferdinand the Bull, who wanted to just sit quietly and smell the flowers, even though all the bulls around him were snorting and butting heads? That's my goal, too.